Archive for the 'In the News' Category

French letters

Posted by on January 31st 2013 in In the News, LMAO!, Video (YouTube, Vimeo etc.)

Recipe for Disaster

 

Ingredients:

  • 3 x Science
  • 2 or 3 x Maths
  • 2 x English
  • 2 x Humanities
  • 1 x language
  • 1 x sprinkling of Computing

 

Method:

  • Take one meddling politician who won't listen to reason
  • Give that politician the authority to tinker and meddle with the ingredients
  • Ensure that the politician gets everything really mixed up
  • Half-bake the mix until it all goes tits-up
  • Give the creation a fancy French name that many kids won't be able to spell anyway
  • Feed it to many thousands of schoolkids
  • Wash your hands of all responsibility
  • Reassign the politician at the next Cabinet reshuffle
  • Let the next Government clear up the mess

 

Well done, you've just concocted the EBC, an inbred version of the EBacc.

It doesn't look very good, does it? I imagine it'll taste bitter with a hint of merde.

 

Where's the landlord when you need him? He wouldn't stand for all that foreign-sounding rubbish.

If he ever stood for election to Parliament, he'd get my vote  🙂 

 

Gone from The Castle Gate

Posted by on December 10th 2012 in In the News

Yesterday's passing of Sir Patrick Alfred Caldwell-Moore, CBE, FRS, FRAS, is sad news to countless folk who are expressing the loss better than I ever could. I'm not good at that sort of thing so I'll leave it to them.

In many he inspired a love of astronomy but in me he also kindled a love of classical music:

 

 

Last night the sky was calm and clear, as close to perfect as it gets here, so it seemed fitting that I should get outside and have a look at The Moon and some objects from the Moore Winter Marathon and from his Caldwell Catalogue.

I'll post some pics later if they pass muster.

So, did you vote?

Posted by on November 16th 2012 in A bit of a rant, In the News

Yeah, I'm on about yesterday's PCC elections.

I'm not usually apathetic about using my democratic rights, but none of the candidates here seemed to want to put any effort into garnering any support. We've had no canvassers, no leaflets, no posters in the streets.

Democracy in action?

More like Democracy inaction.

Would I want our local Constabulary to be run by somebody who couldn't even be arsed to tell us his/her name, let alone what he/she stands for?

No.

I didn't vote because I couldn't make an informed decision.

And now they're wondering why the turnout was so poor.

It doesn't take a lot of brain-power to work it out.

Ask not for whom the bell tolls

Posted by on September 25th 2012 in In the News

Seriously, would you have let The Man with the Merde-Ass Touch anywhere near anybody else's money ever again?

 

 

I'm off out to the betting-shop - I reckon I can get good odds on the markets crashing before trading closes.

Three black flies in my Chardonnay…

Posted by on September 11th 2012 in A bit of a rant, In the News

No. 1

Regarding online services, I spent years (and a small fortune) during the previous century on BT dial-up before switching to phone, email and broadband internet via Diamond Cable during their first month of service in our area. In time they were consumed by NTL who upped the ante by providing us with their digital telly service. In due course NTL were taken over by Virgin Media, they substituted a succession of their own digiboxes culminating in the temperamental VBox.

Tempted by their latest ads for their TiVo service, I phoned Virgin a few days ago in order to change my service to their "Essential Collection" - a 500 gig HD TiVo Box with more channels than you could shake a stick at, a wireless Super Hub, up to 30 meg fibre-optic broadband and a landline with weekend perks. Of course, this new bundle includes their email service. It took ages for them to agree to the correct price as advertised on their own webpage, mainly because I'd be getting more for less. Eventually they relented (after I mentioned the ASA) and a deal was struck.

Before hanging up the phone I asked them to send me an email detailing our agreement and the change of terms of our contract. Yeah, you've guessed it, they wouldn't send me one. Allegedly, they don't have the capability to email me from the sales department.

No. 2

Ella and her mates were mucking about with their mobiles, playing "guess the access code" with each other's handsets. As you'd expect, after her friend had tried too many incorrect codes Ella's phone kicked into lockout-mode and is now bricked. Well, technically that's not true... it's my phone as I'm the mug with his name on the contract, but the phone is still fcuked.

After wasting much time talking to the bewildered support folk at T-Mobile we resorted to the internet to see if we could find a working hard-reset procedure but it was all to no avail. Yesterday I took the handset to the nearest T-Mobile shop and explained all, they said it would need sending back to base for a repair and that it would take up to 28 days. I proffered my own mobile details so that they could inform me as to when the thing was ready to be collected but they declined, saying that they would let me know the outcome by text... to the affected handset.

No. 3

In a bizarre turn of events, a local careers service has closed with staff facing an uncertain future.

Source

Don't talk to me about irony.

😕

Firing blanks

Posted by on August 15th 2012 in In the News, LMAO!
Tags:

Some folk take things far too seriously.