It's got that seasonal feel to it...
I feel a Christmas carol coming on...
all together now...
No "L", No "L", ...
It's a dog's dinner fit for a pack of hyenas.
Archive for the 'Lost in translation' Category
Wrong on so many _eve_s
Owned
Ever wondered how all those grocers acquired their apostrophes?
I have a theory that they were donated by Arla's milk-owning farmers...
That said, the more I think about how to punctuate the label's statement, the less convinced I am about the milk's provenance.
Do I really want to consume the farmer's (or farmers') own milk?
I'd much prefer it to have been derived from a cow.
Agency Provocateur
You know how it works... you tell them your details, your qualifications, your employment record, your preferences for travel distance/duration etc. and they use that info to match you to jobs which fit your criteria.
At least, that's how it's supposed to work.
Yesterday saw another list arrive via email, and I'm told that I am a perfect match for everything on it.
Here's an extract:
I like the notion that there are docks within 25 miles (or 30 minutes) of the (disputed) centre of England.
And it seems that there's not much to choose pro rata between being a Dog Walker and an Armed Security Guard.
That said, I remember when the same preferences led to me being presented with details for what I thought would be the perfect job... quality management... satellite launch hardware systems... company car... travel expenses... Yep, it really was rocket-science!
That agency told me that I was a perfect match for the position.
Only after pressing the agency for more details was I was told that the job was a little further away than 25 miles (or 30 minutes).
It was in Winnipeg.
2 bob bit
Bemused - why "Bobsleigh - Women's Two-man" and not "Bobsleigh - Two-woman"?
Mexed mitaphors
WTF is a "rocket-surgeon"?
BBC iPlayer - Women's Ski Halfpipe Final - Marie Martinod's run, at about 2 hours 44 minutes in.
And the scores for Commentator Competence are in - Artistic Impression: 100.00 Technical Merit: 0.00.
Noun-to-verb tolerance
I'm learning to live with The Beeb's fervent uptake of sport-verbs derived from sport-nouns. During previous Olympic Games broadcasts I used to baulk at "medalling"*, but during the current PyeongChang (IOC) / Pyeong Chang (BBC iPlayer) / Pyeongchang (BBC websites) broadcasts I've begrudgingly accepted not only "medalling" but also "podiuming"* as tolerable, even though they are both ugly words which I'd never use except in angst. After all, do we hill-walkers not use the words "summiting"* and "backpacking"* without fear of reproach?
But I draw the line at absolute bollocks such as "Whoppertron!"*, another word foisted on the world by those whose skis seem to outnumber their I.Q.. As far as I can determine, the word was introduced to the Beeb's audience by a pundit at the Sochi games. Today it was Ilia Burov's third round Aerials display that invoked it.
And as for the Beeb's curling pundit who was of the opinion that the Mixed Doubles is "a young man's sport", or something similar, well, she should be ashamed of herself. I had to leave the room to rant alone.
The world's finest winter athletes deserve better.
Anyway, I'm off to the kitchen to do some "kettling"* and "chairing"* while "laptopping"*. Luckily, we don't have a dog.
* correct spelling/punctuation unverifiable
