Archive for 2011

A caravan in Norfolk – pics

Posted by on September 17th 2011 in A bit of a rant, Summer Holidays

Further to my previous post on the matter, here are a few pics and notes to let you know what you get when pay a princely sum to stay in a seven-berth caravan:

 

Four dinner-plates, six side-plates, six bowls, six cups and one mug

 

Six dessert-spoons, two soup-spoons, two tea-spoons, five forks, one baby-fork and four knives. We had to clean everything before we used it.

 

One gas-oven (with a shelf that wouldn't lie flat because it didn't fit because it was from a different oven) which only worked on Gas Mark 3 regardless of the dial setting. Our S&K pies were supposed to be cooked after 40 minutes but after one hour and fifty minutes we gave up waiting for the pastry to brown and ate the pies on the "rare" side. Of course, the paucity of heat in the oven may explain the fact that an oven-glove wasn't provided.

 

One metal waste paper bin with damaged and hence sharp edges that kept assaulting legs and legwear

 

One knackered catch on the rear door, totally useless for keeping the door open

 

Just for good measure, one even-more-knackered catch adorned the front door

 

The smoke alarm in all its useless glory

Add to that lot the following:

Only four bed-pillows (remember, it was a seven-berth caravan)...

One double-bed, two single beds and two "sleep-on-the-seats" places in the living area, total = six. Did I mention that it was a seven-berth caravan?

An array of saucepans and an array of lids but only one of the lids actually fitted a saucepan...

Casserole dishes without lids (but they would have been redundant anyway seeing as the oven was so shite)...

One fridge with an ice-box inside. The door-seals were knackered so the inside never got cold despite the ice-box being glaciated. Fresh milk lasted 24 hours max in there.

A Bissell-type carpet-sweeper that hadn't been emptied ever, by the looks of it...

A television with only three working channels...

No washing-up utensils, cloths, sponges or scourers...

and not one sheet of bog-roll. How fecking tight is that???

I take it that it's obvious that we won't be staying there ever again.

A week in Norfolk – pics

Posted by on September 17th 2011 in Great Escapes, Summer Holidays

At long last I've got around to sorting and uploading the pics from our holiday at and around Caister-on-Sea.

If you're interested then click any of the following pics to open the lightbox (64 pics).

Here's a taste of what's on offer:

 

Scroby Sands Wind Farm from Caister-on-Sea beach

 

Caister-on-Sea beach at night

 

Derelict Mill, Horsey Mere

 

Dragonfly, Fairhaven Woodland and Water Garden

 

Wot you lookin' at?

eBay Postage Fail

Posted by on September 17th 2011 in LMAO!

Trouble with yer stools?

😯

PC Plodder

Posted by on September 12th 2011 in LMAO!, On the box, Video (YouTube, Vimeo etc.)

RoboCop's distant cousin shows off his keyboard skills:

 

 

Now you know why it takes so long for the Feds to file a crime report.

pmslslslslslslslslslslslslslslslslslsl

Opinions may vary…

Posted by on September 6th 2011 in In the News

... but I think he's a twat.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-14793859

Forget wasting money by taking it down on the train or winching it away under a Chinook.

Lend him some spanners, make him wear a hi-viz jacket with "TWAT" emblazoned across it,

and then make him bring his 4x4 back down himself,

bit by bit.

He should be able to cope with that. After all, he describes himself as an out-of-work freelancing vehicle recovery technician!*

 

* Source: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-north-west-wales-14802363

Holiday Blues

Posted by on August 17th 2011 in Uncategorized

Guess the location:

25m from sandy beach, east coast
Fine view of 30 offshore turbines, of which only 27 are working
10m from four lary Essex families who only break out the beer after the bar & excessively-loud disco shut at 01:30 every night
Caravan lacking in equipment and cleanliness

Wish you were here?
Wish I wasn't.

The good news?
There are only three more nights to endure.